Thursday, August 24, 2006

A loverly bunch

In case you are ever (in the course of playtime with your children, or perhaps some kind of hostage situation) required to impersonate a coconut, here is what to do.

  1. Curl up in a tight ball on the floor, with your knees and forehead touching the ground (and each other, if possible).
  2. Allow children to tap on your back with any available implement (such as the stick from a foil pinwheel, a magic marker, or a toy car) and then complete the job by throwing themselves lengthwise across your spine.
  3. Tip over and crack open by releasing the knee-forehead seal.
  4. Dispense "coconut milk" by stuffing white Kleenex into a plastic cup appropriated from the nearest tea set.
  5. Switch roles, becoming the coconut cracker instead of the crackee. Do your best to avoid having Kleenex "milk" forcibly stuffed into your mouth.
  6. Repeat, ad nauseam.
I welcome suggestions for refining my technique.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh dear God shoot me now. (Or hit me over the head with a real coconut.) You are a trooper woman.

Anonymous said...

I'm visualizing Harriet the Spy's impersonation of an onion, but much MUCH better.

Lady M said...

If I ever have to impersonate a coconut, I will try to find a lime to match! ;)

Anonymous said...

It's the "repeat ad nauseum" part that's the rub. I bet the first time you did it, the game was really fun. The rules are awful cute.

Debbie said...

that's the cutest thing I've heard in a *while*.

seriously. love it.

nonlineargirl said...

I'm glad you posted this. It makes me feel better about the game I watched/helped with today. Girl places each piece of sidewalk chalk in empty watering can. Girl tries to get all pieces out, but her arm is to short to reach the second half of the pieces, so Mom gets them all out. Girl returns chalk to watering can. Luckily before we got too far along she was distracted by our neighbors.

Her Bad Mother said...

The mental image this provided made me spit coffee.

Anonymous said...

This is valuable information. My children thank you.

(actually, the only improvement I can think of is impersonating a pina colada next time -- and grabbing the rum to make it more "real.") ;-)