Friday, June 29, 2007

I felt like I lost the plot a little bit.

Tauropolus's adopted homeTauropolus did not originate from Chersonesos, but he came to his new land by the hand of an insidious receptionist who had sent him an Urgent message: Are you ready to mingle with some beautiful asian singles? Test the sweets of the life yourself.

Sawdust Shopkeeper, a brother who came in from overseas, dressed him in a large platinum chain and a Relief lasso, and supplied him with Inscrutable Scooby snacks, an Oat umbrella, and an answer casserole. The spot where he chose to build a fire-pit was slightly hilly, so his circle of godlike vessels leaned, like an intermediary, eastwards.

These shamanic love spells work. Was it grandiose classification? A waterlogged jump? The figures speak for themselves. “®É©¤k¤ý¤£¥i¯Ê¤Öªº¥[¤À­«ÂI!” A passing girl offers him a solution which enables him to drive home.

What she sees is a Yellow Cab, the exact type that delivers telegrams notifying that oceanography be truth. Howard then asked him if the tires exploded when they got in the car. His servant, Elijah, and the moon ensure that he told him. (Well, there is a lake, and a mountain range, and I suppose New York implies Formidable with zero.) It's a very tasty red; you'll probably have some trouble stopping drinking.

“CA, are you one of them?” The guy then asked Dee what he's got going on in his life. If you don’t know what those young kids are listening to at their discotheques, rinse the barley and add to the pan. The difficulty of the mark will determine the quality of loot. These evil men must be locked up for all their many crimes. I extirpate no caramel.

*

This post, including title, composed entirely of subject lines from spam emails (I added only the words in gray). Really, you could take any one of these and write an entire novel inspired by it. Maybe next November.

10 comments:

Lene said...

Ahh love that spam! Creative use of it.

Elizabeth said...

I had to wait until the laughter subsided before I could comment properly- what the heck is an OAT UMBRELLA??? I am SO TOTALLY going to do one of these posts today! You FUNNY, lady!

mothergoosemouse said...

Wow. That was really creative!

But now I want to visit Chersonesos. Must see all Greek ruins in existence.

Julie Pippert said...

Oh yeah, all the plaigiarism to try to outwit (usually successfully) the spam filters. Highly annoying LOL.

Magpie said...

I thought we'd lost you a little. I confess to being thoroughly confused for a bit, and I shouldn't have been, since lord knows I've gotten a whole mess of those very same type spams.

Funny.

PunditMom said...

I knew there would be some good served by those weird titles!

aimee / greeblemonkey said...

Ha! Clever you are, young grasshopper!

Fidget said...

finally a good use for SPAM!

Patois said...

Lord, that is so funny. I don't get nearly enough original spam to attempt the same. I envy you. I think?

Lady M said...

This is so funny! I'm impressed with some of the Spammers work - sometimes they manage to get the word "dance" in the subject line, and I read it, not matter how unlikely the rest of the title is.